“The three most important things we are going to learn when we die: who we’ve loved, who has loved us and who we’ve helped”. Discussion with psychic and palmist Joe Nicols about life, death and destiny.

Joe NicolsHave you ever been interested to look into the future? Have you ever wondered why you are here and what is going to happen after this life? Have you wondered how much of our life is predetermined and how much depends on our decisions?

To discuss these questions I met with Joe Nicols (http://joenicols.com), a psychic and palmist with more than 30 years of experience.

When did you discover your psychic talent?

When I was a kid I realized that I seemed to know things that other people around me, including my family, did not seem to know. But I learned very quickly to not tell anyone. I learned to keep it to myself. My family is fairly conservative, and my dad was in the military.

Then, when I went to college I got involved with metaphysical stuff. I started looking at palmistry and going to psychics. I really got into it and realized that a lot of it I already could do myself. I did informal readings for people in college, and after that I did it “in the closet” for 20 years, from about 17 to 36, never taking money during 17 of those 20 years.  After 20 years I said I was just going to do this and hope for the best, but I wasn’t motivated by my family at all. I had to do it myself.

When did your parents learn about it?

They did not know anything until I became a professional psychic.  They knew I was interested in metaphysics.  My grandmother and I talked about it, but we never spoke about it to anyone else.

Did anyone in your family have a similar skill?

My dad’s sister was very, very intuitive. My mother was also very intuitive. She told me things which came true in my life. But they didn’t develop it.

On your website you list a lot of different tools that you use like cards, the crystal pendulum, palmistry and others. Which of them do you prefer?

In most of the readings I do use all of them. I started reading palms 50 years ago, and then I started reading Tarot cards 2-3 years after that. I did not like the Tarot set, and so I learned how to read the regular deck of cards. They are not as loaded, not so violent, and I could tune in to the cards much easier than the Tarot. Later, I dabbled with astrology. Also, I learned few years ago that I can do body scanning for health. I can see problems in people’s bodies. Also, like a lot of people, I had occasional dreams that were premonitions.

So, I have a lot of tools to work with and I use the ones that I need for each particular person. Palmistry works well for reading the big picture or a map for the whole life. For more specific things like “should I take this job?”, “what about this relationship?” or “should I move there or stay where I am?” I use the deck of cards as it can give me specific time predictions.  I use the crystal pendulum for simple yes /no kind of questions.

How does the pendulum work?

I don’t know if you’ve ever heard about how people use special sticks to find water called dowsing or water witching? It’s the same thing. The energy comes through the body, so if you are very empathetic and feel things with your body, you can use the pendulum.

If you can read the future, does it mean we all have a destiny? To what extent do we have control over our lives?

There was a great American psychic in the 1940s named Edgar Cayce. There are hundreds of books about him. He did thousands of readings and was one of the people in the 20th century that opened up modern America to psychic phenomena. He was a trance medium, and guides talked to him when he was asleep. When people asked him about the accuracy of palmistry, astrology and numerology, he said only 20% is fixed and 80% is changeable.

My experience is that humans tend to be stubborn, stuck and rigid. We tend to keep 80% and change 20%. As humans we don’t tend to open up that much, so I think there is a lot of free will choice. There are some things that are meant to be, like the place you are born, the places you go, gender, and race. There are also a lot of things I believe we agreed to on a soul level.

“We have a lot of free will choice, even when it comes to our death.”

What are the most common questions people ask you?

The biggest question is love life. Next would be career or money. They are really common, and every day I get those questions. Next, I get health questions. Other relevant topics include specific job or investment choices.

Don’t you think that people ask these questions because they are afraid of taking responsibility for their decision making?

It depends on the person. Some people have trust and faith in life. Sometimes they are not allowed to know, and they just need to make the best choice they can. I see it in people’s hands, and in those cases I may not tell them what to do. They will need to walk through the open door and follow their gut feelings.  Other people who have not had a history of making good judgments and who have stepped in a lot of holes just want a second opinion.

It looks like psychology is involved here as well…?

It can be. I try to not make it a crutch. If someone is coming to me every two weeks and asking me the same relationship question, I try to send him/her to a counselor.  If you just keep coming until you get the answer you want it’s not going be accurate.

So, basically they know what they want?

Sometimes I just have to say “I think you know what you want to do”. I don’t like to tell people what to do, because they won’t benefit if they don’t make the choice themselves.

Can it happen that some people make predictions come true by unconsciously taking the steps towards this “target”?

This is why I like to give people choices. I may say, “if you don’t change, this is what will probably happen. However, if you do this and that, you can make this happen instead.” I don’t make bold faced predictions like “you are going to be divorced” or “you are going to die”. I am here to help people to help themselves.

What do you think about what Paolo Coelho wrote: “When you read the future in the cards, you are bringing the future into the present, and that can cause serious harm.  The present can confuse your future”?

That is a very tricky question, because it relates to what you are thinking about the future. If you have a desire to be successful in a certain field, and this requires a lot of work and education, it helps to have some kind of goal. It can be helpful and encouraging to pursue a goal. Sometimes it’s good to have an awareness about the future, because it sets those goals. When people have goals they very often achieve them.

Or, if people are obsessed with something I tell them to be careful what you wish for, because you can make it happen. They may not be happy with what they get, but wishing for something can make it happen.

Everything in my life is “gray”. I don’t see things as ”black or white”, and you are asking me “black or white” questions. Everything is relative. It’s a continuum. A lot depends on how the psychic phrases it.  You need to be careful giving you power away. This is why I don’t predict death, divorce, or plane crashes, but if I get something like that then I have to warn the person.

Like I had a guy one time who I asked at the end of the reading:

”Do you scuba dive?”

“Yeah, I’m going this week”.

“I think you need to check your equipment, something about your gear”, I said.

And two-three months later I heard from the guy:

“I took my tank to the dive shop and they looked at it and said if I went in the water with this I would have died!”

So I felt really rewarded by giving him a warning, but I didn’t say to him “you are going to die by drowning”. I don’t want to do that. I don’t predict death. I tell people this is between you and God, and I am not going to predict that.

 Does it mean that death can be avoided?

Yes, I’ve seen that a lot of times. I also have the ability to communicate with the deceased, and sometimes they show me things with younger people in their 20s, 30s or 40s. When I am talking to them they point at their feet, and, in that case, it’s a signal that their death was preordained.

However, for the rest, there is some latitude.  For instance, a client should have gone to the doctor earlier, or should have taken the medication, or shouldn’t have gotten in the car angry. We have a lot of free will choice, even when it comes to our death.

Do you believe in reincarnation?

Absolutely. I’ve seen a lot about past lives. I think the world is a bigger place than we know. The idea is not about “well, I can do anything I want because I will come back and fix it in another life”. No, you come back and you are going to suffer. If you take advantage of people now, then in the next life you may be the victim. There is no free ride. It is better to be the best person you can be and make the best decisions and love and help people.

When I was one year old I had double pneumonia and almost died. I have always known there was a God, there were angels on the other side and there was life after death. I always knew that. I didn’t know why, I just knew it. I talk to people on the other side all the time. But Earth is a blessing and living on Earth is an opportunity to make progress. Life is a school or a hospital, not a punishment or a prison. We are here to learn, grow and heal.

“Earth is a blessing and living on Earth is an opportunity to make progress.”

How is it decided who comes here and who does not?

It depends. My feeling is if people die very young or, in the case of infant death, those people come back very quickly.  For instance, I was in a World War II in my immediate past life and died in 1940. I didn’t come back until 1949 in this life. And another thing, I am not sure how it all exactly works.  If everyone has 5 past lives, mathematically there are more people now than have ever been alive in history of the Earth, so it doesn’t add up mathematically. My experience is that we belong to soul families.  Maybe it was not our life, but we were on a team. The team scores, and then everybody remembers that. That may not have been them, but they remember that.

I’ve had several clients who have had that happen. One was a very educated woman, and she had a best friend up in Dallas. She had this dream about being this guy in a ceremony wearing golden feathers or a golden helmet and dancing around the fire. As she was telling the dream to her girlfriend, the girlfriend said “no, I had this dream! That was me!”

So she had the same dream, and that was her. That’s the evidence that maybe it isn’t all us and maybe we belong to a soul family or a team, and we can have a 100 000 members of our team alive right now all having different lives. But I am guessing.

Does it explain the situations when we meet new people and immediately feel that they are soulmates, as if we have known each other forever?

They could be part of that soul family, or you’ve had past lives with them. I’ve had those too, when there is an unfinished business in the other life, and you need to release tension from the past life.

People from the same soul family can be our best friends, protégés, or mentors, but not necessarily family, spouses or love partners. It’s not always that way.

Do you think members of the family (parents-children) are from the same soul family?

I think they have karma and maybe have been in their past life together but not necessarily the same soul family. People mostly love their kids and parents, but it does not mean they are from the same soul family.  The goal should be to love everybody the way we love our parents and kids.

So to me, it could be that you need to fix something from a past life or to heal, and when it heals, you will decide on a soul level if you stay together for another life or separate.  These things are complicated to me.

I’ve heard a similar idea about soul contracts from different people, including astrologists.

To me, the soul contract is not necessarily about a love relationship. It can be about having kids, helping each other heal, supporting each other’s career, loving or hating. This could all be the agreement. I don’t like the word “soulmates”, because relationships are hard work. They drag out our past that we need to heal, and that is not easy.

Do you think each of us has a particular purpose here?

Some people have particular purposes, while other people are supposed to work on things in a more general way. It’s not a “black or white” answer again.

What do you mean by “general”?

The importance of self-development and learning patience is what I’ve learned talking to the deceased and from doing readings. The three most important things we are going to learn when we die: who we’ve loved, who has loved us and who we’ve helped. And it doesn’t matter if we made a million dollars, or we won a Super Bowl, or that we failed all kinds of things. I don’t think that’s going to count much. To learn and to grow are important as well.

About the author:


Oxana believes that every person’s life can make an intriguing story for a book which can teach a lot of wisdom. Life in Russia, England, France, Hungary, USA and lots of travelling around the continents introduced her to exceptional personalities. She loves to share stories about people and destinations which bring new ideas and help to find a way to your true self. This is why she started her blog “In search of the genuine”

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